Tuesday, August 21, 2007

Back-To-Drool! Was That Lame and Immature? Oh Well.

FFFFNNNAAAARGHHHHHHHH.
That's the noise I make when I am livid. Really, it is. Ask anyone.
If I see one more commercial about "BACK TO SCHOOL! BACK TO SCHOOL! BACK TO SCHOOL! PARENTS, IF YOU TRULY CARE ABOUT YOUR CHILDRENS' EDUCATION, BUY THEM OUR PRODUCT! DO IT RIGHT NOW!" I will eat my head.
When did the world decide it was okay to push Back To School down our throats in early-slash-mid-August?
Look, I KNOW I have to go back to school. I REALIZE that all good things must come to an end and eventually my carousing in the sun will have to give way to napping in chemistry class. But do I really need to be reminded of it every thirty seconds?
Don't get me wrong, I like school okay. I am not exactly Hermione Granger, but I'm at least awake and lucid for a fair portion of my classes (strike the napping-in-chem comment from the record, Your Honor).
STILL.
Every two-bit company in North America is using the inevitable commencement of school to hawk their shitty, two-bit product. "Kids, start back 2 (why always the infuriating number-as-word? STOP INSULTING MY INTELLIGENCE, COMMERCIAL!) school in STYLE, with our backpack/cellphone/notebook. And all we ask for in return is $39.95! And your parents' credit card number! And your SOUL!"
Basically, it's been like this.
"Hey, want to start off the new year in STYLE? Well, swing by our store and buy the new TEAKETTLES! Studies show that families with teakettles are 78% more likely to have their children go to Ivy League schools than families without teakettles! So run, don't walk, to pick one of these back-to-school beauties up for yourself!"

So very necessary.
"Hey, kids, guess what? A NEW SCHOOL YEAR IS STARTING! And I bet you're sick of your old, run-of-the-mill pirate hats, right? Cool kids wear the new and improved SUPER-SAUCY SCHOOL YEAR PIRATE HATS! The new pirate hats now come in three new styles guaranteed to fit your head in a sleek, chic and studious way, so c'mon down and check it out! Start the year off sassy with the new pirate hat."

"I know what you're thinking. Why should I buy oranges right now? Well, we at the Orange Corporation will tell you why. We're running a special deal on BACK-TO-SCHOOL ORANGES™! Oranges will boost your little tyke's brain for his or her return to school. Seriously, buy our BACK-TO-SCHOOL ORANGES™ today. Go. Now. Right away.

"Your kid is probably smarter already, just from looking at a PICTURE of the BACK-TO-SCHOOL ORANGE™.

"The only back-to-school commercial (and I'm actually not even sure it IS back-to-school, which makes me love it all the more) that hasn't made me want to hurt someone is this one.


I mean, come on. Kids in backpacks dancing SHOULD annoy me, but "We Want the Funk" by Parliament is playing. It's okay by me. In fact, it makes me laugh so hard I nearly unseat myself every time it comes on TV (Yup, I'm THAT dynamite. Don't be too jealous).
By the way, I could have discovered a new continent, hiked the Himalayas and grown a full beard in the time it took to upload that video, so please enjoy the dancing children and Parliament. In fact, please watch it more than once, so I feel like I've gotten my money's worth.

Anyway, back to my point. If you are a commercial for jeans or cars or cellphones or what-have-you, just SAY THAT. Don't do all this "Fall is here! School is starting! WHOOPEEE! Now buy me!" shit. I am, while perhaps not MENSA-level in the brainpower department, not stupid enough to fall for your transparent schemes. In fact, it for some reason brings to mind an old Mitch Hedberg quote which I heard whilst suffering through the five-decades-long act of a misguided stand-up comedian who thought it would be awesome to retell EVERY JOKE MITCH HEDBERG EVER TOLD in a fist-eatingly dull monotone. “I hate turkeys. If you stand in the meat section at the grocery store long enough, you start to get mad a turkeys. There's turkey ham, turkey bologna, turkey pastromi,.Some one needs to tell the turkey, man, just be yourself."- Mitch Hedberg.
It's not like I'm totally DREADING the new school year, but the constant barrage of reminders makes me feel kind of panicky and boxed-in, kind of like on Sunday night when you've done no work and you have mounds of things due tomorrow morning and you've chosen to spend your evening inhaling empty and completely unnecessary calories, talking on the phone about nothing, watching TiVoed Top Chef episodes and wishing you could trade your crappy sorbet for smoked scallops in truffle sauce.
It's just a stressy, fidgety feeling that hangs just out of reach at the back of your mind like a particularly annoying mosquito you can't quite swat. "Only a week to go! Have you shopped yet? Are you prepared? Are you ready? Do you have your stuff yet? Do you? DO YOU? DO YOU?" And the incessant commercials really only exacerbate that general on-edge nerviness. Keep in mind that I am not a person who deals well with pressure- the night before a big paper is due, you are most likely to find me running in circles in my room screaming and drinking caffeinated beverages and drafting mental plans to escape to Uruguay, far, far away from papers and responsibilities. I'm trying to get my mind off the nerves by looking at amusing pictures such as this one (heh. Animals are funny) but it's not working.
You know what, I'm going to get my inner Crazy Mumbling Lady on the Street Who Throws Wine Bottles on and say that it is all the GOVERNMENT'S fault that back-to-schoolsiness is being forced upon us. Can we all be in agreement that it is the government's fault? Thank you.

In other news, I am totally coveting this little mod coat from Popgloss for back-to-...Oh God, now I'M doing it! FALL, I meant. I'm coveting it for FALL. I know mustard yellow flatters nobody, but isn't it sort of adorable? These earrings would put me nicely in touch with my inner vineyard-owning, wine-tasting gutter lush. I also have a deep, infinite, passionate, Mr. Darcy-and-Elizabeth-Bennett-style love for these pumps. Oh sweet God. They make me want to be a better woman. I think they would look so great under sheer or opaque tights, and even though I tend to shy away from backless in fall I would completely make a grand exception (that is, if some kind fairy godmother were to get totally high and decide she needed to buy these for me). Oooh, in spite of my annoyance with BTS merchandising I must say fall is one of my favorite style seasons. I'll probably do a post about my fall wish list soon (so think of this as the preliminaries, if you will), and I am fairly excited to go FALL shopping. Just fall. Not the dreaded BTS-word. Or perhaps...AUTUMN shopping. Does that have a nicer ring to it? I think it does.

THE MOVIE, MUSIC, TV & BOOK CORNER- So I have a problem. I have a deep, long-running loathing of the show called The Hills. Surely you know it. Cat-fighting, club-hopping bitches bond over boys and rip each other apart over rumors. I mean, really, I hate this show. I think the world would be a better place if it didn't exist. And I know what you're thinking- "If you don't like The Hills, just STEER CLEAR OF IT. Christ." But it's not that easy. I'll be on the treadmill or reading a magazine and info about The Hills will just plant itself into my brain in a way that info about World War I never did, and before you know it I know exactly who Audrina Partridge is and who she lives with and who she's dating. It's embarrassing for me, a professed Hills-hater; I'll be ranting about the annoyingness of this show, and whomever I'm talking to will mention mildly that I seem to know an awful lot about it for someone who hates it so much. And I'm left to turn purple, mutter something under my breath, and slink away in shame like a...shamed slinky. Do you see my paradox? It's not like I'm saying people shouldn't WATCH The Hills if they're so inclined- I am hardly a map of good TV taste myself (I have seen every episode of Saved By The Bell ever made, as well as Full House, and I'm a sucker for that gloriously, painfully tacky "is-this-what-our-country's-youth-is-coming-to" show My Super Sweet 16. And I have been known on more than one occasion to sit through a made-for-TV Lifetime special starring Nancy McKeon). And I know if I REALLY didn't want to know about the show, I could stay as far away as possible. But our damn culture makes it so hard to remain cool, aloof and ignorant about bad TV! Damn you, pop culture! So, to sum up...The Hills sucks, and I'm a hypocrite.
Being the world's biggest Jane Austen fan, I decided to swallow my misgivings (i.e. Anne Hathaway annoys the crap out of me, and she looks like she'd be really smug and obnoxious if you met her in person) and go see Becoming Jane. My verdict? Ehhh. It's not that Hathaway was awful- she actually wasn't half bad-but the whole thing was sort of...I don't know. Succinct, aren't I? Basically, I don't claim to be an expert on Jane Austen's life, and I have no problem with cutening up history to sell movie tickets, but it all felt a little fake and fluffy. I didn't hate it, though (in fact, at times I really liked it), and I am now predictably in love with James McAvoy. They did have good chemistry, even if the whole thing felt a little bit farce-like. When I got home from the movie, craving more Austenization, I watched the original version of Pride and Prejudice, with Colin Firth and Jennifer Ehle. Awesome.
Being a literary scholar of extreme proportions, I am reading a little-known tome called Uncle John's Curiously Compelling Bathroom Reader, which I (sadly enough) recieved as a Christmas gift. It is kind of curiously compelling. Do you know the origin of boxer shorts? Well, I do. And it is juicy.
Ooh, and I just read a little book called Back Talk, by our own ALEX RICHARDS! SQUEEE! It was great, and I was flipping out over the coolness of the fact that SOMEONE WHOSE BLOG I READ WROTE IT! Happy days indeed. Everyone read it, you won't be sorry. And I'm not just saying that because there's a good chance A.R. will read this- it's a really cute, funny, well-written book and the author doesn't condescend to you the way teen-lit authors usually do. Plus, quotes from Heathers!
In music news, I just discovered Carole King. Why did nobody tell me how great she was before?

SIGHTINGS- I finally saw someone walking around in a House Of Holland tee. It was the "Cause Me Pain, Hedi Slimane" one. Oh, and by the way? The new "Cum Again, Christopher Kane" shirt? Naughty! And kind of gross, actually. But mostly, naughty! And I also saw a girl prancing around in the sparkly blue equivalent of Maya's inexplicably amazing pink glittery shoes (I don't know if they were actually the same shoes- they didn't have the rockin' bow that Maya's do, but they were still le sex). What is it with you girls and your amazing footwear? I'm wearing straw flip-flops with a hole in the bottom right now. They're embellished with koalas eating bamboo. Seriously. This is why I'm hot.

CURRENT ATTIRE- The aforementioned straw koala flip-flops, funky graffiti-printed Smack boy shorts, soft, comfy white V-neck tee. The sort of thing you can only wear with a coffee and muffin in the bliss of solitude.

Oh, I almost forgot! I didn't announce the winners of my Bratz caption contest in my last post, so after careful deliberation, here goes...

What is this Brat thinking?
In 1st place is the fabulous Dilemma, with "Note to self-must remember to fill Valtrex perscription ASAPZ. These crabs are so itchy! Bee Tee Double-U, what is this femininininsm? Is that itchy too?"
AWESOME. Dilemma, as a prize for your supercalifragilistic wit you will win the following mention of how rockin' and hilarious you are. I know it's a lame prize but we at the Emma Corporation are cheap. If I was craftsy I could send you some funky Etsy jewelry like Ambika does, but...I am not craftsy. Sorry. But really, people, Dilemma's blog is frighteningly well-written, hysterically amusing and she basically never does a bad post. So check it out if you haven't already.
In 2nd place is the lovely Mrs. Fashion, with " " Yep, that's right. She's not thinking anything.
At. All.
Her brain is empty.
Have I won?
Why yes, Mrs. Fashion, you have, because I laughed out loud reading this. By the way, those are quotation marks with nothing in them, as in to indicate that the Brat's mind is blank. But you all probably got that.
In 3d place is the brilliant AmyLiz with "Oooh, furry zebra print purple patent clogs falling from the sky? A giant blue and pink teddy bear to complete my lovely lovenest? Oh, no, a..." *CLONK as a large safe smashes her flat on the sidewalk*
Brill. Check out her blog, people, it's muy cool.
BONUS- Maddy's "This is my pensive face." Simple, yet hilarious.
By the way, you are all so farking funny that it was INCREDIBLY difficult to select just a few winners. Stop being so witty, you b!tches! No, don't, really. Me likey humor.

до свидания, забавные люди
(I'll leave you to figure out what that means in Russian)

60 comments:

Maddy said...

All right, I was mentioned on Emma's blog! I will use this fame to amass fortune of Scrooge McDuck proportions. I will use this money to invest in Back-To-School oranges. They look like an excellent product.

Maddy said...

Oh, and by the way, I am totally in love with James McAvoy. I saw him in The Last King of Scotland, and his sexiness transfixed me even through all the gore and political uprising and so forth. Wow that made me sound dumb. Um, well, I thought Forrest Whittaker was good too....

Dilemma said...

I might cry. This is the happiest day of my blogging career. You know, I've never won anything before so this is a BFD.

Seriously though, after I wrote that I thought, "Wait, is Valtrex what you use to treat crabs?" I mean it's not like I would know anything about STD treaments...someone needs to call P Hilton stat. Hilariously enough, I actually have her old phone number in my cell phone from when Shanna Moakler(at least I think it was Moakler...) leaked all that stuff on her myspazz.

Heidi and Spencer Pratt(I love how fitting their last name really is) make me want to punch babies, and I don't even watch the show. DID YOU HEAR HEIDI'S NEW SONG? Spencer actually RAPS in it. That truly makes me itchy.

Stylefinder (Editor) said...

Emma you have to stop being so damn funny, you have people giving me weird looks as I giggle and snicker and laugh out loud from behind my desk at reception.

You rock.

Mrs Fashion said...

I came 2nd? For rizzle? Woo Hoo!
I commented and then was laughing at everyone else's lovely funny words and actually got in a bit of a strop cos my comment was way dull - I mean, since when did empty space ever win a caption comp? I seriously thought I might come in your, oh, top 100 - if you were in a good mood but... phew... Thank you lovely Emma!
x

jungle dream pagoda said...

"Austenization",wouldn't it be fun if they created a website where you could "Austenize" yourself ne' "Simpsonize".
I thought perhaps Hathaway was miscast.

mary said...

i love your blog emma, i truly do. i can always relate to things so much, but i'm always too intimidated to comment because you have about 478482589 other comments on each post and i know somebody at some point has said the same thing as me twice. not that that actually made sense. in conclusion, you're great!

mary said...

hmm, i just realized that gushingly adoring comment was not perhaps in keeping with the necessary "aloof, cool, better-dressed-than-thou blogger" image we're all supposed to be trying to cultivate, but screw it. your blog is awesome!

jayne said...

haha i used to love BTS shopping, something just enthralled me about picking out sparkly pencils and folders with puppies on then, but ever since high school began and we no longer got a list- but the teachers still thought it was ok to yell at you on day one when you didn't have a freakin 3 ring binder you didn't even know you needed, its lost its appeal. and i used to wear a uniform for 10 yrs, so BTS clothes shopping, never really happened, we just went, as you put it, autumn shopping (it does have a nice ring to it :) and now it just so happens i need crap for school too so hence i get more!! oo! hehe i'm sorta dreading going back to school- hw and tests, but then again i have been a bit bored and unproductive as of late, plus im a senior so its a whole new thing...

that commerical is the shit lol, i just love mastercard ads :)

the slinking away quote- totally sounded like georgia nicholson haha, i know someone has made that point before, but this is the first time when i've really noticed it, good work ;)

i totally loved fullhouse, for some reason i always identify w/ middle children on TV like jan brady or stephanie tanner haha, odd considering i'm an only child. and my super sweet 16 is fantastic, it makes me feel better about myself, always good ;) and i know what you mean about picking up lots of popcult shit rather than history notes haha- if only my lexicon like knowledge of lindsay lohan's scandals was useful

JAMES MCAVOY! DROOOL! i love him, he has a great taste in movies, and he's soo hot! haha, he looks paritculalry sexy in the upcoming atonement, which i plan to post on later...

woah, sorry long comment, but long post soo its reciprocal i guess haha

WAT said...

This has to be one of the funniest rip-roaringly hilarious post ever. I'm at work right now laffing my head off. I really really hope you don't eat your head by the way. That would be very grotesque and ghastly.

This post is comedy gold!

SOLID!

Shelby said...

Oh, Emma, how you forget! It is not merely "back 2 skool" it is BACK TO COOL. BECUASE BUYING SHIT IS COOOOOOOOOOLLLLL. Ha. I'm freaked about this year. Stupid AP exams. And James McAvoy is hot like FIAAAAH. Except the ehole Jane Austen Fight Club scenes confused me.

alexgirl said...

Yay! Woo hoo! Yippppeeeee!!
Thanks for the big ups, Emma. I'm so glad you liked Back Talk. If you hadn't, I definitely would have cried.
And congrats to Dilemma on her Bratz quote. Hi-larious.

amyliz said...

Yay, thank you for choosing my caption! Exciting.

I've been rather addicted to the old Colin Firth/Jennifer Ehle P&P lately myself, I'm in the middle of the book too....

Isabel said...

AGREED! BTS advertising seriously blows. I wouldn't be surprised if advertisers are reading this now and secretly plotting to put back 2 school oranges on the market.

Farren said...

so i totally bought that pirate hat... and those kids dancing are hilariously cute. too bad i never found "people who understand you" in high school. hahaha.

your uterus skipped a beat? mine did as well when i saw him. he's a cutie. <3 his name is rashaan.

This Girl said...

Did you say super-saucy? You did and I love you for it.

I also love that there is another person on the planet that shares my feelings on Anne Hathaway. I want to do violent things to her person and I'm not sure why, but I'll go with what you said.

James McEvoy. Didn't I just read something about him somewhere? Give me a minute . . .the new Star Trek film maybe or maybe I'm hallucinating . . . again.

fashionista said...

hilarious. love the kids in backpacks dancing! omg. i died laughing with that thing. i definitely need to get me one of them back-to-school oranges as well. wow. i DO feel smarter. these really work.

fashionista said...

russian words:

Good-bye, amusing people

that was totally thanks to freetranslation.com. i have way too much time on my hands.

Anne said...

I love that commercial. Seriously, it made my day. Thank you for posting it. So. Much.

Bella said...

James McAvoy...mostly I just...um...LOVE HIM....that little yellow jacket is so cute...and i want grape earings now....

bigglassesgirl said...

I find Anne Hathaway annoying as well. She irks me the way leggings as pants irk me.

sarissa said...

HEY!
so great to be cack in the blogosphere fandango, before i compose my firsty in two months or something i thought i'd read some of the posts i've missed from my faves, and i laughed out loud at yours.
i'm feeling slightly hermione aboiut starting college, however shameful that may be to admit.. mehh, i have no shame. i in fact have back to school shopping to pop and i'm to ise the term lightly, BARE excited since its the first time i've been uniform-free in six years.
great post! xx sarissa

Hayley said...

Hee. Back-to-school commercials have to be in the top five of most annoying seasonal advertising (any aspiring pundits who want to fill in the rest of the top 5, go wild). Although I'm a sucker for a good teakettle/teapot - there should be one in every room of one's house, colour-coordinated to correspond to days of the week, hell, I'd wear one on my head if it could be disguised to resemble some kind of jaunty chapeau. Yay for tea!

Carolina Lange said...

I also hate those back to school advertising!
Your posts are allways so much fun to read!
Love the pumps!

pins&needles said...

I'm sick of back-to-school commercials. America is absolutely infiltrated with high-powered commercialism that it's not even funny and it's probably ruining our society. Your are quite the funny lady.

Jamie said...

Funny! I agree with you about the back to school thing...even though I was oddly obsessed with buying school supplies, I hated school, and it always gave me that anxious feeling you talked about. I still shudder at the thought.

I too am a Jane Austen worshiper, thus I am nervous about seeing the movie...but James McAvoy = hot, so I think my susceptibility to attractive dark-haired men will win out in the end and I will see it anyway.

Chelsamajiggy said...

I agree. FFFFNNNAAAARGHHHHHHHH.

I know when I go back to school, I'll be my typical self (nerd with a side of too cool for words with a sprinkling of lovable ... oh, how highly I love you, dear reflection!), but the BTS (honestly, take the T out of that acronym and it's closer to the truth) commercials are enough to drive any average individual into lunacy.

A few of my friends have fairy godmothers that are drug addicts, by the way. Sadly, I'm not sure how to contact them or I'd be wearing Versace right now.

Uncle John's Curiously Compelling Bathroom Reader. Hmm. I must say, Emma ...
I join you. Not that one in particular because Uncle John writes a lot, but there's one with quotes. Very funny. Very interesting. Makes me feel intelligent with a side of retarded, which is how all people should feel; the world would be a much happier place, I think.

Regardless, thank you for another post. I love reading this. And thank you for the comment! Always appreciated.
Keep at it!
=)

P.S.: до свидания, забавные люди means, "Goodbye, amusing people", doesn't it? Or "Bye, funny people."
Something like that, I'm sure.
Tell me if I'm close, lol.

CountryGirl_CityLife said...

I will be staying FAR away from all school-related shops through Sept. I will be purchasing myself some fine back to fall-new-job clothing though.

I must admit emma, you are quite fashion forward to wear your shoes under your tights, that has to be a hot look.

Alexa said...

oui! i'll add you to my list. and most likely link you when i finish that book in about a week.

Fabi said...

Whenever I see you have a new post, I prepare myself, open up my snickers bar (shh) and begin to concentrate. and laugh. goodness, I even have fun reading the comments you get!!!
take care emma!!! your stuff is perfect.

(p.s. I don't think it can get any hotter down here! dean bean barely touched us!)

Regina and Renee said...

yea i def know what you mean! i dont want to go back to school, and i dont want to hear about it all the time!! im so sick of it!!!! sorry i havent been commenting lately, or really posting for that matter!!!!! great post!

~exoh~
ray

CC said...

I hated Becoming Jane. I also didn't understand over half of what they were saying...and I've never read any of Jane Austen's books :( I really tried to read Pride & Prejudice but I couldn't understand what they were saying!

Quinto Sol said...

Emma - You rock girl!

riz said...

i <3 u!! this is absolutely hilarious. and back to school sux a lot

dusk&summer said...

I hear you, the words back to school send me into a deep depression.
also I definately have that picture of the melon hat wearing kitty on my computer lol

coco said...

hahahahahah that picture of the cat is amazing
i will be laughing all day i think

Eritia said...

Ha I love that commercial. and I despise the hills, stupid show. Plus you mentioned Pride and Prejudice which made me happy, although i have yet to watch the BBC movie in it's entirety, I was thinking of doing it today, seeing as I'm on vacation with nothing to do but get tan, watch endless hours of tv, and eat double stuffed oreos.

Belle said...

I hate BTS adds. i have thought of hidding from the TV in order to say away from them, but then they just come in the paper, or I have even got a popup on the computer. so i caved after a day and started watching tv again.
All of your post crack me up!
belle

Frasypoo said...

I am guilty of giving my husband that"Uncle John" book!Its funny...I read it sometimes.He has never touched it!

penelope said...

haha u're blog.. i gta say it's hilarious!!!1 oh god! u sound so much lyk my homegirl! ranting yr head off but extremely funny at the same time!!

anyhow d winner for the bratz caption thing is so freakin vulgar; but so deserving! it was hilarious!

-ciao bella- said...

i lurrrvvveee james mcavoy. and back to school shopping used to be fun when i got to pick out cool like american girl dolls pens and pencils and whatever but now i hate it because it means that in like hours all the binders are going to be filled with work and school stuff that at some point i'm going to have to do... sorry i'm majorly venting because i start school tuesday= KILL me!

Curiosity.Killer said...

You are hilarious, y'know?

I actually gotta say I like "The Hills", maybe it's just because I don't get shit like that overseas, and I'm just slurping up what I can get. LOL

Your contest sounds fun - and you have some real good submissions - I particularly laughed at Mrs. Fashion.

BTW, I love those heels.

ambika said...

Ok, I know I read this and somehow I must have fallen into a coma before seeing my own shout out. Seriously, thank you, you rock for mentioning me & my funky jewelry on your hysterically funny blog.

And I love that mustard coat, too.

Blue Floppy Hat said...

James McAvoy is....droolworthy. I can't really find another word for it that wouldn't get me autocensored off my pet online forums, so droolworthy he must remain for now.
And back-to-school pirate hats? You're kidding, right? But do get the grape earrings, you'll be vicariously fulfilling my deepest desire to wear daft fruits on my ears (I've got a pendant with a bunch of purple glass beads for grapes and two little green glass leaves- prettiest thing in the world, only I seem to have lost it- and the shop I bought it from sold the matching earrings before I could scare up the money to snag them for myself).

mandie said...

so sarcastic, right?
just loved it!

i hate school, i think it sucks and people really shouldn't do happy comercials when schools can mean only one thing: sleepy people, lack of freedom and more...

l1zzy said...

ahh i would love to but i have no idea how! haha everyone keeps asking me that. can you tell me how? thanks :]

Gloria said...

grape earrings.

yum.

Amy said...

hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
nice post!
and i agree
the cum again, christopher kane one is grossssssss

mushroommeadows said...

hehe those captions are pretty darn funny. :)

Anyway, I'm already back in school, and I feel your pain. :(

Meg said...

I actually started snorting with laughter at this post, and my sister was all "what's so funny?" but I didn't tell her because I wanted to keep the laughing matter to myself. THAT is how much I love this blog. It's weird how James McAvoy is all famous now but I remember when he used to be on Shameless with his real life wife (who is much less attractive than you might think, but a good actress.)

Re: I am proud to be have a "rockin'" blog, so proud that you may use the word as many times, whenever you wish. Seriously.

Romeika said...

Oh i sort of liked "Becoming Jane", and James McAvoy is sooo handsome hehehe

re:yes, we can exchange links.

lalaliu said...

HAHAHA... god i love reading your posts.

I feel kind of sad about the back to school commercials because once my school starts, the "back to school" is already over. I feel left out. I want to be bombarded with those annoying commericals and feel the anticipation of having to wait a whole year again just for summer to start, but I never will. But life must go on, right?

Moose on the Loose said...

have fun going- BACK TO SCHOOL!!!!

Brian Mandabach said...

Back to school marketing is and always was cruel. And when you add the early school opening dates (schools that start earlier in the year do better on standardized tests used to compute No Child left behind scores) to overall insane levels of marketing all over the place, you get madness squared.

Once upon a time you could see a hockey game without advertising painted on the boards and imbedded in the ice. Wasn't that a waste?

Mrs Fashion said...

What a pretty new picture! I like sparkly things.
x

Viva Las Divas said...

that post made me laugh SO MUCH

Eritia said...

thank you! and oh good lord, she does!

riz said...

ahhh, post, post post. Can't wait for more adventures in snarkiness. Love it! Love the description of the Barneys salespeople. I went to the Saks Shoe Land, and they were pretty ridiculous there as well. Surprise Surprise.

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